i may or may not be watching the land before time
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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