i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
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