Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize