I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize