i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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