She said her name was "party"
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Randomize
