You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
