About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Randomize
