he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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