Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
