i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize