I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
