I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
