I swear she didn't look like that last week.
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
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