the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
