I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
Randomize
