Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize