16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
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