Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
this just has baby written all over it
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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