Texts From Last Night

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  (703): View more from Virginia

  I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space

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  (703): I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space http://tfl.nu/29mq
  Replies (27) Good night (4733) Bad night (639)
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  (219): View more from Indiana

  She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.

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  (219): She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day. http://tfl.nu/oasv
  Replies (24) Good night (4011) Bad night (1379)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.

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  (304): I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up. http://tfl.nu/ory7
  Replies (46) Good night (4111) Bad night (1652)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  we need to drink 2009 down the drain

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  (718): we need to drink 2009 down the drain http://tfl.nu/q0df
  Replies (16) Good night (5039) Bad night (678)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."

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  (512): She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not." http://tfl.nu/pkrm
  Replies (18) Good night (6321) Bad night (1410)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know

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  (845): What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know http://tfl.nu/y6wb
  Replies (5) Good night (4404) Bad night (1273)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.

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  (407): And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword. http://tfl.nu/gcmk
  Replies (21) Good night (8715) Bad night (1100)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.

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  (517): Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying. http://tfl.nu/uj2j
  Replies (3) Good night (2158) Bad night (836)
• Favorite

  (931): View more from Tennessee

  nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.

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  (931): nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot. http://tfl.nu/k46y
  Replies (5) Good night (1215) Bad night (502)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.

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  (402): I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off. http://tfl.nu/dyhi
  Replies (2) Good night (1103) Bad night (865)
• Favorite

  (239): View more from Florida

  Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.

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  (239): Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance. http://tfl.nu/mqe0
  Replies (10) Good night (953) Bad night (539)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.

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  (405): Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want. http://tfl.nu/hc2w
  Replies (1) Good night (608) Bad night (282)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL

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  (330): easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL http://tfl.nu/8uqk
  Replies (4) Good night (847) Bad night (359)
• Favorite

  (251): View more from Alabama

  well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras

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  (251): well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras http://tfl.nu/4zxu
  Replies (1) Good night (298) Bad night (327)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life

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  (618): If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life http://tfl.nu/7oxt
  Replies (1) Good night (425) Bad night (226)

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