farters have to be the big spoon...
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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