you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
