If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
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