I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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