Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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