I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
is that a dick in a sweater?
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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