I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize