No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Randomize
