I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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