i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Randomize
