I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize