He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
its liver damage thursday
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
