Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
