Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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