im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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