Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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