i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
