I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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