I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Randomize
