the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize