i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
