Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize