is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
