okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
