when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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