I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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