I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Randomize