they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
