I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
