Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
