Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
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