I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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